At the time of my illness with Covid 19, I couldn't write and even think normally. Tired at home with Covid complications for two weeks, I felt at the lowest point of my life. I really never felt so weak before and I didn't believe that this virus would be able to afflict me like that. In the past, Covid seemed to be a disease of seniors, and healthy and athletic people like me don't have to worry about it. Needless to say, I don't think so now. I now also look very differently at all the prohibitions and restrictions that have been imposed. Yes, it is still difficult for me to accept many of them, but now at least I understand that all restrictions are an attempt to protect people from this disease. No one, including the government, knows what to do, because the modern world has never seen such a situation. I do not want to get into discussions about what is the right approach to reducing the spread of this virus, but I urge everyone to assess their responsibilities personally. I just want to share my experience and say that this matter must be taken seriously. I was not prepared that in addition to physical complications and health problems, there would be a moral decline. I don't like to use the word depression because it's a clinically diagnosable disease, but for the first time in my life I felt really depressed. After these two weeks, I didn't want to go anywhere or do anything, my motivation to work was lost, I didn't even want to talk to Anna. I slept in bed, mindlessly watched Netflix, and when I could eat normally, I only ate some junk food. Although I felt better during the second week, I didn't want to resume training or even go for a walk (my family doctor allowed and even recommended walking, as long as I avoided other people). Even crazier, my apartment had turned into a mess, and I had never before physically looked and felt so miserable. I needed some kick in the ass, and in the first days of March I got that kick in the look of my new car.

Several months ago I wrote that I had a good option to buy my dream car. Although I couldn't test it myself, it didn't matter, because I had read everything about this car, and even without a test drive, I knew I wanted to own it. So I did it, paid the required amount and bought it from afar. But then the second wave of Covid started, and my car got stuck in Germany and then in Lithuania. Finally, this car was delivered to Latvia, and I was able to pick it up. What exactly is this car, I will reveal to you in the next article, when I will tell you how I finally got to it. All I can say is that this is not a cheap end car, and this vehicle is one of the biggest trump cards in the sports car range with impressive power. However, the fall in market value and the pandemic crisis brought the price of the car closer to the thickness of my wallet. Of course, even now it is not a cheap pleasure, but since my income for the last year has grown and stabilized, I was finally ready to buy this car. About the car itself, and my experience with it, I will tell in more detail in one of the following articles, so far I can only say that the fact that the car is finally in Latvia was the best news I had received this year, finally some good news.

So I was able to drive to get my new car, but the stupidest thing was that I was still in quarantine and I had to sit at home for several more days. Under the direction of my family doctor, I was allowed to return to society on the first weekend in March. So I only can get the car on March 6th. That meant I had to wait another 4 days for me to finally be there. WHOLE 4 DAYS! Never in my life has time gone so slow as these damn 4 days. It was such a stupid feeling that something I've been waiting for for months is right here, but I can't reach it. Such very positive feelings, but at the same time torment. I knew that I would like to receive the car at the first moment, as I would be taken out of my house arrest, so I talked that on Saturday I would collect it from the company that had finally delivered it to Latvia. I asked that Dāvis would come with me too, and I hope Anna will not be angry that the first thing I will do as the quarantine ends is to drive after the car, not visit her.

Meanwhile, physically I was already feeling much better, and also the moral message about the car "got me on my feet". Although I was not allowed to meet people for several more days, I decided to return to my normal daily tracks. I started by tidying up and cleaning my apartment. Under normal circumstances, I would have hired a cleaner to do this, but since I was still in quarantine, this time I had to do the cleaning myself. As well as when I cleaned the house it seemed like something symbolic. I had heard such wisdom that if you want to improve something in your life, start by tidying up your room. I also resumed light home workouts, my body was still exhausted, so I was not allowed to force it immediately. For an hour and a half a day I started working with my money making method again. Life began to appear in brighter colors. There was also more enthusiasm to talk to Anna. When I said I had bought a new car, the first thing she asked was, "What color?" Anna recognized the cars only in size and color. However, she was no longer as angry with me as she had been in the early days, but she still seemed disappointed with Valentine's Day. I promised myself that I would definitely reimburse her.

I spent the last week of self-isolation recovering morally and physically. In these 3 weeks I learned a lot about myself. The first week was physical hell, which made me appreciate the details of everyday life when nothing special is happening, but I feel good and healthy. In the second week, a moral decline began that I had not expected, and I discovered my emotional pit to which I would never want to return. In the third week, I found the strength to slip out of this pit and return to normal life, which made me realize that there is always a way out of all shit. I also realized that you can't joke with health. Just because I've never had a serious health problem before doesn't mean I'm invulnerable. In the future, I will also consider more carefully when I can afford to not follow the rules and restrictions. I also understood what a moral pit means. At one time, it seemed that people in a depressed state were to blame for not being able to find joy in life. Now I realize that it is much more complicated, and it does not always depend on the will of the person. I am most glad that no one caught the disease from me. Anna didn't feel any symptoms, and although Natalia no longer communicated with me, judging by her latest Instagram posts, she was healthy too.

However, the greatest joy is that my new car is finally in Latvia!



In this blog I want to share the stories from my personal life. You will be able to read my beliefs, thoughts and confessions from personal experience. In order not to hurt anybody, I've changed people's names and introduce myself with pseudonym Mr Hunter.


Riga, LV


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